Posted 2 months ago Comments

 Every year many of us often make New Year’s resolutions that we know we have no intentions on keeping; that is exactly why I did not make any last year. Yet, I saw many changes in 2011. The best act that happened this year for me is that I finished grad school. (Yay ME!) I often look back now and wonder how did I work full time and be a full time student with my numerous 15+ page papers in both classes and homework due every day. I know that it was not me that could have done any of it alone; it was only by the grace of God and prayers from loved ones that got me thus far. This year also bought illness into my life in more ways than one to those I hold the most dear to me. I am happy to know that although the illness will be ongoing that things are not as bad as we had thought.

The most interesting thing that happened this year is that a client asked me if she could give me a word and many of the things she told me were occurring in my life and by whom left me with an open mouth. I didn’t know this woman from Adam and she was telling me what was going on with me like we grew up together or something. I have seen much of what she said occur and the rest is being unveiled.

I noticed many changes in myself as well. People I use to enjoy the company of I’m fine only acknowledging them in passing. I began to separate myself from everyone and didn’t even communicate with people. The funny thing is that they didn’t reach out either. However, I noticed some of the “friends” I were once close to and communicated often with now we are as separated as oil and water.I noticed how some sorors I once defended in the company of others now barely want to speak to me at all or how some of them purposely try to make me feel uncomfortable in group settings; but that’s sisterhood? I am no angel but I am pretty sure I come close to it. If I do nothing else I am always fair and believe everyone should be treated respectably. Therefore, that is all I ask in return. If U don’t like me fine but respect me and I will return the favor. 

I have even re-united with some old friends and gotten rid of relationships that were not so healthy for me. I realize as much as I try to be the peacemaker, go with the flow and the smooth out things between everyone, that all people will not like me. The reasons they choose not to is up to them but they will not and I just have to be okay with that. There are even persons who attach the title of friend to me who are and have been everything but that. I have heard that you only get a sprinkle of real friends in your life time. So, those few who are willing to ride with me know that I’m willing to do the same for you as long as time allows. And to those who decided to exit I would like to say your season in my life served its purpose and it was not by chance that we had an opportunity to encounter one another. I truly learned from our experiences so, THANK YOU!

Life is a game that I have never quite understood the hand I was being dealt but in the long run I always see how everything worked out for my good. I must remind myself of what the Bible says: Psalm 23:1-6 tells me that the lord is my shepherd and I shall not want… Philippians 4:13 tells me that I can do all things through Christ which strengthened me. Psalm 37:1-2 Fret not thyself because of evildoers, neither be thou envious against the workers of iniquity. For they shall soon be cut down like the grass, and wither as the green herb… Matthew 20:16 So the last shall be first, and the first last: for many be called, but few chosen. So, 2011 I would like to say that you have truly been a struggle personally & professionally but I am attempting to cope. I must say that I will not be sad to see you go. Therefore, I bid farewell to 2011 and hello to 2012.

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